Random Acts of Kindness

... There's a fellow I pass on the way in to work every morning, between the bus depot and my office. He's a scrappy little guy named Roy who works the graveyard shift somewhere in Woodburn, a town about 20 minutes away from here, and we know each other only in passing - a smile, a "Good morning!". I often see him carrying two coffees that he picks up at McDonald's as he is walking in to the downtown bus depot from the commuter bus dropoff - one for himself, and one for the bus driver.

This morning, he stopped and handed me this, simply saying, "I got this for you today," with a smile. No reason. Just knew he'd see me, and picked up a little something extra. I gave him a hug in return.  :)

... It is amazing how just that one little gesture made such a huge impact on my world. It only cost him $1 and a few moments of his time, but who does that sort of thing any more?? And why don't people do it more often?!?

My day was going fine before that, just following my normal routines, feeling a little blah - but just that one tiny thing made me stop completely in my tracks and re-evaluate a few things. Like, why don't I do things like that? Is it really such a hassle for me to stop and think of the people in my world - and do just a tiny little something to brighten up their day?

Thank you, Roy, for reminding me of what's really important - and how the smallest of gestures can make such a huge impact on another person's world.

F is for Focus

We've been having parenting challenges with a couple of our little ones lately, primarily revolving around a lack of ability to focus and pay attention. They can be told something - instructions, a rule, or what have you - and moments later it is as if they never heard it. As you can imagine, this is rather frustrating. Admittedly, they come by it honestly... I was diagnosed with both ADD and "absent seizures" as an adolescent, and these two definitely share those tendencies!

However, I am of the opinion that behavior is learned. While they may have tendencies toward spaciness and forgetfulness, they can (and will) learn ways to deal with it - as I continue to do even today. Staying on top of things is a constant struggle for me, and I see that reflected in my girls' behavior. It's not out of any sense of laziness or malice, just a simple "Oops; I forgot!" ... But it does have real-world consequences, some of them pretty serious. As an adult, if they "forget" that they have work on a certain day, for example, that could very well be the end of their job - setting in motion a whole crazy CHAIN of consequences!

I am finding that there is no easy answer to teaching my children how to pay attention, focus and think through their actions. It is a constant process of learning (or teaching, depending on where you stand), and is different for every person. An excellent article I came across that offers some practical and effective suggestions for teaching children to focus is titled (prepare to be shocked) "Helping Children Learn to Pay Attention", by Jane M. Healy.

Many of the suggestions Dr. Healy offers are things we already do in our household. Many others are things I understand and support, and just haven't had the time to put into practice! Family martial arts and yoga have been on my "must-do" list for a long time now, for example. *laughing*

I have to wonder... Would so many kids (and grownups) have "ADD" and other focus difficulties if we didn't spend so much time indoors and plugged in?? I highly doubt it. Someday, we'll move out to the country and test that theory.  :)